Perfectly Reasonable — or Daddy’s Double Standard?

So then…my husband David suggests that we try to eat dinner around 5:30 pm every day, otherwise our kids (age 3 & 5) tend to get a little hanky (hungry-cranky).

Good idea. So we follow that schedule.

Cut to three weeks later:

I let David know that I need to work late this evening. No problem, he says.

I come home at 7:30 pm to a completely clean kitchen.

Awesome! He must have fed the kids, then cleaned up afterwa—

Wait a minute.

I enter the family room where the kids and he are watching TV.

I greet everyone – hugs, kisses – and inquire about their days.

Then, when the kids are out of earshot…

Me:  Did you feed the kids?

Him: Oh. Nah. (shrugs) They didn’t seem hungry.

Me:  They said they weren’t hungry?

Him: I didn’t ask them. They just didn’t seem hungry.

Me:  They didn’t SEEM hungry? You mean they weren’t writhing on the floor, clutching their bellies, begging for sustenance? They didn’t faint of malnutrition right in front of you? They didn’t collapse in front of the refrigerator with their tiny little fingers clawing at the door? OK, let’s just not feed them until they SEEM hungry. That sounds like a splendid plan!

He grins at my melodramatic contortions, but still attempts a lame, “Well, it’s OK to miss a meal once in awhile…”

Uh-huh. Hmmm. How interesting that the “once in awhile” happens to coincide with the one night I’m working late and he’s in charge of feeding them.

So if I’m around, dinner should be at 5:30 – but when he’s at the helm, dinner should be when the tykes send him an engraved invitation?

Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great Dad – and usually pretty helpful with the kids – but this time, it’s a bit of a double standard, right?

Or do I just need to train my kids to pound their silverware on the table and chant “FOOD, FOOD, FOOD!” like li’l prison convicts when they’re hungry?
Hmm, seems like a Daddy Double Standard if you ask ME -- but YOU decide! #funny
— Darcy Perdu

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28 replies on “Perfectly Reasonable — or Daddy’s Double Standard?

  1. Julie said:

    Ice Cream…. even if they don’t seem hungry, they’ll eat ice cream…

  2. Tracy Frederico said:

    I would’ve come unglued. 7:30 and toddlers haven’t had dinner? The melt down is moments away. The unreasonable and unstoppable crying is about to begin. You will be feeding them half cooked food because it will be 8:00 before anything is ready. Face Palm!

    • Face Palm is right! Thank you for agreeing with me!
      I almost wonder if there was some heavy snackin’ going on all afternoon…hmmm…

  3. Dana said:

    As soon as they get cranky, you need to take your husband by the hand and place him right in front of the crankiness. Then point at him and say “cry at daddy, he likes it!”

    • Bwahaha! Exactly, Dana! If he created the situation, he can handle the fall-out! :)

  4. while the cat’s away…….

    Cereal – the go to fast food for dads

  5. Alex said:

    I recognise this so much – it happens all the time! So annoying because it makes one look like a nagging wife when one mentions it and that is unfair especially if THEY came up with the plan/rule.

  6. Paul said:

    I say give them cookies and wait until Mom comes home. I find the Double Stuff Oreos are the best bet. – they have flour, sugar, butter, all good food groups.And the kids can serve themselves. See how it all comes neatly together? :D

    • Haha! You’ve got it all figured out, Paul!
      Only problem — Mama LOVES her some Double Stuff Oreos and will have already gobbled them all up! :)

    • Thanks, Sheila, glad to know I’m not alone! Love those hubbies, but want to bonk ’em on the head sometimes! :)

  7. Yep. I’d be pissed too. It probably is a double standard. . . BUT, if it was only this one time. . . ? Either way, maybe he learned from this incident? Maybe? Or am I just hopeful? ;)
    Reta Jayne recently posted..Workin’ Hard or Hardly Workin’?My Profile

    • Yes, he kinda learned from the incident because I make sure I tease him about it from time to time, just to keep the lesson “fresh.” :)

  8. AinOakPark said:


    Even my husband, who can’t find his, well, that’s another story…

    Even my husband can open a can of refried beans, put it in a microwave safe bowl and throw some pre-shredded cheddar/jack cheese on it and heat it in the micro, then serve it with “baby carrots” which just need to be rinsed (so that’s within his “cooking” abilities) and peel and slice some cucumbers for what our family calls “Bean Dip Dinner” – a dinner reserved for those days where it’s too much to even go to fast food for dinner.

    Sheesh. And I bet he hadn’t bathed them, or even put them in pajamas either!

    Julie’s idea is genius and I wish I’d thought of it. (It’s one step better than pancake dinner and sooo much easier!)

    • BATHED them?
      wiping tears from my eyes from laughing so hard

  9. My husband would totally have done the same thing. And our kids get SERIOUSLY hangry if they haven’t eaten by 5:30. He’s an amazing dad, but grew up in a house with 5 siblings and a mom who didn’t get home until almost 7 every night. Doesn’t quite get the whole importance of a schedule :)
    Kate recently posted..For Better Living…My Profile

    • Ha! Glad to know other hubbies out there would do the same thing! We’re not alone!

  10. Anne said:

    I guess I was blessed. During the week, the kids were mine. I was a stay-a-home. But on the weekend, my hubby took over their care 100%, feeding, dirty diapers and keeping them on schedule. He would even make sure that bottles were ready to go in the fridge for Monday morning for the baby.

  11. Mel Berry said:

    Ooh, this sounds like our “we need to start eating healthy!” (From hubs)…. Dad’s “making” dinner = takeout. Smh. At least they’re fed, I guess.

    • Right? Dads sometimes have lots of great ideas, as long as Moms are the ones carrying them out! :)