Making a Bodacious Blunder – in Front of My Boss — OF COURSE

Of Course I Make a Bodacious Blunder in Front of My New Boss! So Embarrassing & So Funny!  #humor #boss #office

So then…she starts rattling off all the things we need to do on the day of the big benefit, so I scribble notes as quickly as I can.

This is only my second week on the job, so I’m not entirely familiar with everything my boss is saying, but there are 3 other staffers in the office with us and they all seem to be nodding along.

I just graduated college — and now I’ve moved to Manhattan to work in public relations at a Fortune 500 company on Park Avenue! I can’t believe my good fortune, but I know I have to work my ass off to keep the job!

My co-workers are all fast-talking New Yorkers, so I struggle a bit to keep up (what with me being a sweet drawlin’ Southern gal and all).

My boss lets loose a brisk list of directives involving the caterer, tele-prompters, speakers, nametags, photographers, and music.

As she doles out assignments, she says, “OK, Darcy, you’ll take the limo over to CBS to pick up one of the honorees, Marlene Sanders, and bring her over to the Waldorf Astoria. Go straight to the VIP reception. Brenda, make sure the speeches are in the press packets over in the — ”

But the rest of the sentence fades away because all I can think of is the part where she told me to go pick up broadcaster Marlene Sanders at CBS. I can’t do that.

But I don’t know if my boss knows that I can’t do that.

And I don’t want to interrupt her rapid-fire commands to the group – especially since everyone else seems to be taking their tasks in stride.

I’m starting to sweat. I can barely concentrate. I want to be the can-do girl, I really do – but I have to tell them I can’t do this. It will be worse if I keep it to myself.

So in the middle of her monologue, I boldly blurt, “I’m so sorry but I can’t pick up Marlene Sanders and take her to the Waldorf! I only have a Louisiana driver’s license, not New York! And I think you need to have a special LIMO license to drive a limo, anyway, and there’s no way I can get one of those by Friday—“

Everyone stares at me.

I blush from head to toe.

My boss bursts out laughing. “Darcy, we don’t expect you to DRIVE the limo to pick up Marlene. Just go IN the limo with the chauffeur, pick her up, and escort her to the VIP reception to make sure she gets where she needs to be.”

I am mortified.

Everyone giggles. The other staffers roll their eyes at my naiveté. They will repeat this story in the lunch room for weeks to come.

But I don’t care.

Because I am so frikkin’ relieved!

I cannot tell you the PANIC I felt — just thinking about me being unlicensed and trying to drive a big-ass limousine through the chaotic streets of New York, desperate to find a parking spot near the CBS building!

Thank God I only had to ride in the limo. This is a talent for which I am uniquely qualified!

— Darcy Perdu

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Original Illustration by Mary Chowdhury for So Then Stories

(OK, out with it! Share the times you’ve embarrassed yourself in front of your co-workers or boss! Whether it was a summer job in college – or your first day in your current career – I KNOW you made a bodacious blunder or a funny faux pas – so share it with us in the Comments below!)

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33 replies on “Making a Bodacious Blunder – in Front of My Boss — OF COURSE

    • Dani, I’m in love with you too! Thanks for all the shout-outs on Twitter — you’re awesome to help spread the word about So Then Stories!

  1. Liddle-Oldman said:

    I dunno. I’m with you. I’d hate to try to learn to drive a limo in New York traffic myself…


    • Exactly! I’m even nervous when I back up my minivan — I couldn’t imagine operating a limo!

  2. marc whiten said:

    OK Darcy, now you know how I felt when I worked FOR YOU at that Fortune 500 company and you told me…”Now honey, you go fly into San Antonio, set up the company 40 booth-space display and hire models to staff it. Then go to the dinner and have the VP give the organization a $50,000 check”. I figured, putting the display together would take me about six months. Hiring models sounded like fun. But how in the heck was I going to come up with $50,000?

    • Ha! Man, we had some good times working for that company!

  3. So funny Darcy – I sent a text to my boss that was meant for my boyfriend; in the message, I was complaining about my boss!

    • Good point! Although when I lived in NY for 6 years, I would tell everyone that I was so “rich,” that my car was yellow and I had a rotating chauffeur — then I’d point to a cab!

    • Omigosh, Suzanne, I can’t believe you weren’t tossed out on your keyster! Very understanding boss!

      One of my email accounts is programmed so that when I press “Send” it automatically searches the email for the words “attach” or “attached” — then it will ask me “are you sure you want to send this? did you forget to attach something?’

      I need a similar program that will ask me: — “are you sure you want to use profanity and sarcasm in this email? did you double-check the recipient’s name before hitting Send?”

  4. I’m not sure this was my blunder, but here goes: I once worked for a non-profit where the offices were a separate wing attached to the founder’s home. I was told we could have lunch at the dining table or in the backyard. There was a meeting at the dining table, and I opted for the backyard option. The blinds were all shut in the back, and when I opened the sliding glass door, I saw the founder’s husband sunbathing on the deck, in the nude.

    My office manager later apologized for forgetting to tell me about the “don’t go outside when the blinds are shut” policy. I ate my lunch locked in the bathroom that day.
    Robyn recently posted..There is something about the outside of a horse…My Profile

    • LOL! That must have been quite a shock! Who the heck sunbathes NUDE while there are people working in his house?! Well — apparently — THAT guy! Too funny!

  5. Laura said:

    I was helping my boss look through a catalog to pick out a template for some calendars we were going to order. I had noted several that I thought might work and after we looked at those, I noticed a sealed section in the back of the catalog that I hadn’t looked through yet. I said, ‘oh, maybe there are some in here.’ I opened the sealed section, only to realize that is where they advertised the semi-nude/nude calendar templates. As our eyes met, and I turned beet red, we silently agreed to never mention that I had accidentally showed porn to my male boss. We didn’t speak for the rest of the day.

    • ha! how embarrassing! and how funny! I would have turned beet red too! you accidentally “sexually harrassed” your boss by showing him that porn! hilarious!

  6. As a NYer myself I just had to smile at this post. I hear it all the time that we’re bad drivers, we’re rude and pushy etc. I didn’t realize how great a driver we were until I moved to Colorado 2 years ago. You’ll get to love it as much as I do. Hope you’re having a fab week!
    Growing Up Madison recently posted..Sanus TV Mount Safety GiveawayMy Profile

  7. Why’ve I never come across your blog before – it’s hilarious. Gonna add it to my blogroll. Nice writing, btw…

  8. Judy said:

    Oh my! I would have thought the same thing as you. I hate to drive so I always make myself scarce when they are looking for someone to drive candidates or big wigs around. Then I realized no one would want me to in my 12 year old beat up hatchback. When I traded that in, I got a pick up truck so I think I’m safe unless the candidate has furniture to haul around too!

    • hmmm why exactly are you driving CANDIDATES around? are you a campaign worker? a lobbyist? a high-priced escort?

  9. Tais said:

    Oh my gosh hahahahaha. I love this blog so much, the stories are amazing and I would almost believe that you make them up, if not for the huge probability of me writing stories like these when I’m older. But, almost as good as your stories are people’s comments haha. Seriously funny!

    • Thanks, Tais! Yep, all the stories are true — and I LOVE reading the Comments because people share THEIR funny true stories too — and sometimes truth is funnier than fiction! :o)

  10. Pingback: Priceless Mom Moments: Mortified - in Public - in CHURCH - Cloudy, With a Chance of Wine

    • Ha! What a creative idea for a new weight loss program!