So then…I totally crack up. My friend Mindy, whose husband produces TV commercials, sends this genuine email to me and a bunch of her friends to request something for her husband’s shoot:
Subject: Rick’s latest commercial
Hey, if you know of anyone who would want to do this… yourselves included, please forward along…
Hands and Feet Wanted for commercial!!!
I am a producer of TV commercials and I’m shooting a Public Service Announcement the week of April 15th.
I am looking for female hands and feet. Age range 21-40.
Pay will be $150 for a one-day shoot at ***** Studio in Woodland Hills.
If you’re interested, please photograph the top of your hands and/or the top side of your feet and email the photos to: *********@********
Please, no jewelry or tattoos.
I know it’s a legitimate request, but I just can’t help myself. I send a “Reply to All” saying:
That is the most creative method of gathering fetish porn that I have ever heard of!
Clearly Rick is titillated by sexy feet and this is his clever attempt to amass a large collection of feet photos under the guise of a casting call.
Nicely played, Rick, nicely played.
I myself am shooting a PSA commercial about male reproductive organs, so please send me photos of male penises.
Peni? Penises? Not certain of the plural terminology.
Whatever the case, please submit photos to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Unlike Rick who prohibits jewelry and tattoos, I actually prefer such adornments, so go wild!
Age range 21 – 40. No elderly peni please.
My sister responds with:
I’d be happy to share my penis photo collection with you when you visit next weekend.
My friend Kate responds with:
The plural for penis would be cocks.
Ha! Thanks for clearing that up, Kate! I want to be grammatically correct when I solicit my fetish porn!
And speaking of funny porno stories…here’s a doozy!
— Darcy Perdu
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(Receive any odd emails? Know someone who REALLY likes feet? or hands? or peni? Would you let your feet be filmed for $150?)