My Daughter, the Italian Truck Driver

My Daughter, the Italian Truck Driver P Clear
So then…I confirm I’m available for dinner with the other three Margarita Mamas a week from Tuesday, but I add a P.S. to the email, directed to one of the Moms who is known for meticulous and enthusiastic grooming for herself and her daughter.

I write:
Kate, I can’t believe I’m asking this question because my daughter is only 12 years old, but she has the big bushy eyebrows of an Italian truck driver. Where do you take your daughter for her eyebrow waxing/shaping — and once you start, do you have to go weekly to maintain it? If so, that’s too much money and I will just change Chloe’s name to Emilio the Hairy-Eyebrowed Truck Driver.

My Daughter, the Italian Truck Driver Movie Star                   (the eyebrows look a little something like this)

Mindy chimes in:
I know Kate has a place she likes, but you can also consider xxxxxx Salon. Going every 2 weeks should be fine – or teach her how to pluck! Poor Emilio…

Kate writes:
My daughter and I go to xxxxxx Salon. We go every two weeks and it’s about $20. You may not have to take her that often. Good luck!

I respond to all THREE Moms, jokingly:
Thanks, Kate & Mindy, for your referrals for eyebrow shaping. Sherry, where do you take Jack?

Sherry responds:
You’re hilarious! I was cracking up when I read the first e-mail. Jack wears his hair so long, I think he’s going for the “Cousin It” look. I’m not even sure if he has eyebrows…

I respond:
Love the Cousin It remark! I literally had to bribe Tucker to get a haircut and to shave his long sideburns and wispy hair that is growing along his jawbone. He wanted to “grow it in to see if it would become a beard.” The hair stylist and I told him it would take CENTURIES to grow those wisps into a beard — and it would just be a beard UNDER his chin, so he’d end up looking like one of the Appalachian hill people! Lord help us!

Sherry replies:
Ugh, boys and their hair. I thought my daughter would be way worse, but my son’s the difficult one. Yet, he still wants me to comb his hair every morning. I asked him if I’d be getting a key to his apartment when he moves out — or should I just move in next door, so I’d still be able to comb his hair in the morning. He just gave me “the look.” My daughter laughed. But him, not so much. As for Tucker, I would love to have seen him before the haircut and shave. What “style” station are they watching that they think it’s a good look for them? National Geographic – Neanderthal/Appalachian Style Network…?

I respond:
That’s hilarious about you possibly having to live next door to your adult son so you can comb his hair each morning! As for Tucker, when his hair grows – it grows OUT – not DOWN — so he looks like he has a poofy big-hair coiffure like a 1960’s librarian. I was so relieved he consented to cut it short!

My Daughter, the Italian Truck Driver Librarian                                   1960’s Librarian Hairstyle

Click here to see photos of overgrown eyebrows of Chloe (aka Emilio the Truck Driver)
Click here to see Tucker’s 1960’s librarian hairstyle and Appalachian wispy under-chin beard

(NOTE: If photo links do not work, it’s possible my children have disabled my linking capabilities and hidden all photos of themselves, lest they be publicly humiliated.)

— Darcy Perdu

(Any fun follicle follies to share about YOUR kids? Anybody who shuns haircuts, eyebrow waxing, and beard shaving to live a more hirsute lifestyle? With our Italian-Irish heritage, our family’s soooo lucky that our dark bushy hair really POPS on our pale alabaster skin! I practically have to shave my legs HOURLY! Share your hair tales in the Comments Section!)

My Daughter, the Italian Truck Driver P