Ménage a Trois ALREADY?

So then…Tucker slides down the playground slide and lands with a satisfactory thud in the dirt. He beams and scrambles up the ladder to repeat the rush of the freefall.

I grin at this darling 4-year-old in all his glory this sunny afternoon.

After one more whoosh and a thud, he runs over to plop on the ground next to me and grab a handful of grapes. Such purity and innocence of a carefree child.

“Mommy, can a man marry another man?”

Huh? Suddenly all my senses are on alert, clutching for the politically correct answer for my 4-year-old. Where did this question come from? Maybe one of the kids at preschool has two daddies?

I need to give correct info – but not overwhelm him with too much info. I can’t imagine he’s expecting me to delineate the intricate issues involved in a same-sex marriage political debate. I settle for something simple.

“Well, honey, in some states, yes, it’s possible for a man to marry another man. But in any state, if two people love each other, they should feel free to be together.”

Tucker grabs a cracker with his pudgy little hand.

“Can a man marry another man and another woman?” he asks.

Uh-oh. Where did he hear about ménage a trois? Good grief. What’s going on at that pre-school?

“Um, no, honey, not really. Usually a marriage is just between two people. Why?”

He furrows his brow and looks up at me wistfully. “Because when I grow up, I want to marry you and Daddy and live with you guys forever.”

Oh.My.God. Melt my pea-pickin’ little heart.

(OK, your turn — share a bizarre question from your kid – or a warm-hearted moment – OR details about your latest ménage a trois. Your choice.)

– Darcy Perdu

If you smiled -- share it!
If you LAUGHED -- share it TWICE!

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25 replies on “Ménage a Trois ALREADY?

  1. Judy said:

    So cute! This reminds me of my friend whose young child asked, “Daddy, why can airplanes fly?” Daddy went into a long description of aerodynamics and wind thrust ad nauseam. Finally the kid turns to my friend, “Mommy, why can airplanes fly?” Mommy’s answer, “Because they have wings.” “Oh. Okay.”

    And I had a good laugh at your “What’s going on at that preschool?!”

  2. Keyla said:

    hahaha, that’s so cute.

    My heart warming moment: B, my 3 year old nephew was walking with his dad and I back to the house and he was holding both of our hands. His dad asked “B, why do you always have to hold our hands when we walk anywhere?” B shrugged and simply stated “Because I love you”. Too much cuteness!

    His older brother, H, is 4 and he was helping me in the kitchen making breakfast asking all sorts of 4 year old questions… what’s this? what’s that, how come? why? when? what…?
    H: What’s this? (pointing to a plum)
    Me: That’s a plum, hun.
    H: What’s a plumhun?
    Me: what-oh, it’s a fruit, go show papa your plumhun
    To this day they are still known in our house as “Plumhuns”

    • What a sweet nephew to say simply “Because I love you!”
      And that’s hilarious that you have plumhuns at your house!
      At my house, we drove in the “mivi-van” and walked on the “tread-meal!”
      Darcy recently posted..Ménage a Trois ALREADY?My Profile

  3. Suzanne Whitfield Vince said:

    What a darling story! The things kids say.

    The funniest thing I can remember was when my daughter was 4. She was eating a container of yogurt and when she got to the bottom she gasped. “What is it, Sweetie?” I asked. “Mom, they hide the strawberries at the bottom so nobody will find them!”

  4. mimi gin said:

    My husband and I were talking about having an “empty nest” and things we would do around the house. You know, making this room an office, etc. My daughter, age 6 or so, pipes up with “well will sleep.” When asked what she means she says, “well when I grow up, where you gonna live?” Huh-sweetie, I’m living here! It’s you that will move out!

    • Your daughter sounds pretty sharp — she MAY be the one who ends up in the house and YOU’LL be looking for new digs! My son says that when he grows up, he will let me live in his “mansion” with his family and he will even let me have a TV in my room, even though I don’t let HIM have one in his room while he’s a kid!
      Darcy recently posted..Oh No, You Can’t Expense THATMy Profile

  5. AinOakPark said:

    I would walk with my friend, Jane, every afternoon after my husband came home from work. Her last name was Taylor, and my children were taught to call adults by their last names, so she was “Mrs. Taylor.”

    Every day, my five year old would ask, “Who are you going to walk with?” and I would respond, “Jane. Mrs. Taylor to you.”

    Finally, one day she “got it” and asked, before I went out the door, “Are you going to walk with Mrs. Taylortoyou?”

    My mother counseled me to ask, when those sticky questions come up, something like, “What do you mean?” or “What do you think?” because then you can always add your two bits later, because, you know that sometimes you find out that some babies come from Chicago. : )

  6. Mary Beth said:

    My dad loves to tell this story about me at age 6. We were walking though the supermarket and I was asking him lots of questions about the upcoming election (Bush v. Reagan, I believe), like, “What does he think? Why should we vote for him? Is he a good person?” My dad was so impressed that, at a young age, I was asking such intelligent questions. Then, at the checkout aisle, I asked if I could offer one more question. My dad said, “Sure, Sweetie.” I responded, “How can you breathe with all that hair in your nose?” To this day, he laughs himself silly when he relives that one.

  7. One time my little sister asked me if she will get my bed when she’s ready to sleep alone. I told her she can and she said, “Cool, so you can sleep in the big bed with mom and dad.” :)
    Xae recently posted..An ApologyMy Profile

  8. gina said:

    My 4 yr old asked me this morning if his little sister would have boobs like me when she grows up? I said Yes! He then said “And hair on her vagina?”

    Ummm… yeah….hahahah

  9. Sara said:

    I was golfing with my three year old son last year. While we were on the course, he saw a tiny apple laying on the ground that had fallen out of the tree prematurely. He picked it up and asked, “Mommy? What is this?” I replied, “a baby apple”. Innocent inquisition right? Yeah, no. It was abruptly followed by “Mommy? Where do babies come from?” I choked on my soda and gave him the deer in headlights look. Then gave my friend who was golfing with us the deargodhelpme look. I wasn’t prepared for this question…not yet! He was only three! Luckily, my dear friend replied, “They come from hospitals, love.” I was so relieved and grateful at that moment. Especially since the answer seemed to satisfy him. So, bullet dodged, at least for now. I know this question will eventually come up again. And next time, I fear that the simple answer of “the hospital” will not suffice.

  10. Ha! This reminds me more of a comment my daughter made when she came home from day care one day. She comes home and says (to my husband), “Daddy, my friend Bob has a butt and a hose vagina.”
    What? First, we’d been good about teaching her the correct names for private body parts and I knew the day care did as well. So where did THAT come from? And what in the world was going on that she actually would SAY this?
    (Before you get concerned there is an open bathroom for all day care kids in that center and she walked by one day when her friend was peeing and saw a bit much). The story of the hose vagina cracks me up to this day. And I’ve not even blogged about it yet!

    • Love it! Now, if someone is being a jerk, I’m going to say, “You know, you’re acting like a real hose vagina!”

  11. Awwwh so sweet, funny how we read too much into what they say sometimes. Aaah innocence.
    Vivian recently posted..Deviant DogsMy Profile

  12. Katherine said:

    OMG I so love love love those moments! Darcy, I promise promise the picture is coming! I am in the process of packing and moving so have not had a single (good anyway) photo op! But there will be a gorgeous blue shirt and me and perhaps a mountain in the background soon!

  13. Beth said:

    My friend’s precocious son got me twice–when about 8 or 9, as my friend parked the car and R and I walked through a crowded parking lot into a children’s play, he asked loudly (and out of the blue) “How come girls can have babies and boys can’t?” A brief answer of girls and boys have different parts, and he was satisfied.

    As a pre-teen, his mom was living with a boyfriend, and they were renting a room in their condo to a lesbian, and I went to visit. His mom had always referred to me as her girlfriend (just a term, we’re girls and friends), and during the visit I was admiring a handsome passing man, and R piped up, “You can’t look at him; you’re my mom’s girlfriend!” That one was a LOT trickier.

    This is also the child who called his mom into the livingroom one night when they were talking about Michael Jackson on the TV, and showed an old picture of the Jackson 5 with Michael circled–”Mom, they’re lying on TV!! They said that Michael Jackson is black!”

  14. Emily said:

    We were on our way home from a visit to my mother-in-law’s house. My then two year old daughter was asleep in her car seat while my then five year old son was tired but still awake. We were discussing my brother-in-law’s marriage to his wife, Robin.

    Son: “Robin is a bird’s name, Mom. Did Uncle Stephen marry a bird?”

    Me: “No. Robin is a girl in this case.”

    Son: “Oh. When I grow up, I want to marry my sister so she’ll never move out and we can always live together with you.”

    Me: (just responding since I’m tired too and still have a long drive ahead of me) “Sorry, baby, but that’s impossible.”

    Son: “What? Why?”

    Me: “Well, you can’t marry your sister.”

    Son: (beginning to get upset a little) “Why not?”

    Me: (still oblivious) “It’s the law.”

    Son: (crying softly) “Who made up this stupid law?”

    Me: (tuning in but finding the whole situation funny) “I think it was God.”

    Son: “OH NOOOOOOO!” (degenerates into hysterical sobbing)

    Me: (feeling guilty at his level of hysterical distress but barely able to talk for trying not to laugh at him) “It will be okay. Sister will never leave you. She’ll always be your sister and you guys can live with me for as long as you want to.”

    Son: (incoherent sobbing)

    I dial my mother on the phone and, taking deep breaths between words to keep from laughing out loud, eventually convey the situation to her. I explain that I can’t help because this has hit my funny button and I have no idea what to do to calm him. She is not amused and tells me to give him the phone.

    Son: (still sobbing inconsolably) “Uh-huh…I want to marry her!…Because I love her…(slows to sniffles)…uh-huh…(snuffles just a little)…uh-huh…okay. Here, Mommy.” And he hands me back the phone.

    Me to my mom: “What did you say to him?”

    Mom: (with great disgust) “You idiot. I just told him if he wanted to marry her when he got old enough, we’d talk about it then.”

    • So sweet that he wants to marry his sister! Love that you could barely suppress the giggles and your mom had the correct answer at the ready!